Tuesday, 26 July 2011

When You've Made A Terrible Mistake

©Sunrise in Sun Prairie

Well, isn't that a dramatic sky? It fits my current mood perfectly. I seem to have gotten myself into a bit of a panic here lately and now I need to calm down and sort it out. Its all to do with this lovely house you see. The problem is, it isn't mine.

Oh on paper it is, my name is right there on the lease. But my things don't belong here, and I have been suspecting for the last week or so (grace period over), neither do I. I have spoken to Duncan and he is going to help me fix it. 'It' being, find a new house back in the city. Back in the 'cultural quarter' from hence we came. We lived there for 12 years. Then we moved to an estate (to have a garden and to be closer to my Mum), and then we moved here, a reactionary move from the estate.

Its frankly a mess. But the bottom line is, I cant stay here. I feel like I have had my holiday and its time to go home. My things look alien to me, the house isn't  'flowing' for me, and my child literally vomits every time I bring him home on the bus.

Turns out, I belong in the city. I have tried to like it here , really I have, but when you know, you know. I hope that everyone will forgive me, so that eventually I can forgive myself.

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