Or maybe not. I am not sure which order to put this in so I will start in the middle then work back and forwards. Last year I noticed Oscar was tired a lot, I mean A LOT, but he was dropping his afternoon nap and I was sure this had some relevance (I still do really). Then the clocks changes in October and then the days were dark and depressing, then Christmas and New Year and all of these things can interfere with sleep patterns.
So, skipping back to 1969, when I was born. Just after I was born, my Mum was holding me and I turned blue and floppy. Mum yelled for a nurse who gave me a thump on back (charming), said it was gas, and passed me back. My colour went back to normal and that was that. For the next 2 to 3 years my Mum kept saying, 'there is something wrong with her, she is just so tired all the time'. I was also prone to bugs, and infections and had a poor appetite. The Docs kept telling my parents there was nothing wrong with me and it even went so far as a note being left in my medical notes saying, 'Valerie has a first time over anxious mother'. My parents persisted and waited until I was perfectly 'healthy', no bugs, infections or sore throats to cloud the issue and then took me back to the Doctor and said 'NOW check her again'. And that time they found a heart defect. When I was 3 1/2 my heart murmur was corrected with surgery. It took many years for my parents to see any real improvement in my health, and in all honesty I have remained a fairly easily tired person my whole life.
In 2009, Oscar was born extremely quickly after an extremely difficult labour, and he was (and is) beautiful and perfect and he gazed into my eyes as soon as I held him, and then they cut the cord (Duncan had declined) and Oscar turned blue and floppy. The midwife grabbed him from me and ran out of the room with him, even though I had specified that one of us was to stay with the baby at all times should any complications occur. What seemed like ages but was in fact just a few minutes later the midwife put her head around the door and said, don't worry he is pinking up nicely now he has some oxygen. We did talk about my heart defect several times and actually I had had medication to protect me in labour because of my heart. We were told his heart was absolutely fine.
Yesterday I went to my GP to discuss losing the baby and any follow ups I would need, but I had made a double appointment, one for me and one for Oscar. I was well aware that if I mentioned this ever increasing niggle I had about Oscar and his tiredness and both our birth histories, that the GP may well dismiss it as over anxiety due to losing a baby 5 weeks ago. Oscar was so tired yesterday that I had to pull the pushchair out from under the recycling boxes on the porch and take him to the Doctor in his pushchair (he was asleep by the time we got to the bus stop)., and really, this made me stick to my plan.
To be fair, the Doctor did listen carefully to what I was saying and she did agree that there seemed a need for investigation (particularly when I told her that the nursery teacher had commented that nursery seemed to take a lot out of Oscar). I am not sure why, but even though I had built this big picture up in my head, I still didn't expect her to agree with me. So, you can imagine how floored I was when she listened to Oscars heart for quite a few moments and then said 'actually I can hear 'something'. There is a definite whooshing sound in one of the chambers which may or may not be a murmur, or in fact the same defect that you had. FLOORED!
Oscar is being referred to pediatric cardiology for testing and we are trying to remain calm and not let things get blown out of proportion. My underlying thoughts on it today are, thank goodness I pushed on and mentioned it, and if it is the same problem as mine, it is a life shortening condition without treatment but not a life threatening one with treatment. Mama's I would urge you to listen to your own hearts where your children are concerned, no pun intended.
p.s. my heart defect was a Patent Ductus Arteriosus