Babies I CAN COPE WITH, after all, whats it all about if you don't have a reminder of why its actually worth it. Pregnant ladies, NOT SO MUCH, I am not jealous, or wishing anyone's baby away, its just too hard right now, to feel so pregnant without a baby to look forward to. So while I have been avoiding some blogs I am trying to fill my time in other ways.
I am still having morning sickness, and in fact, yesterday was really bad. I had heard that overpowering morning sickness is a 'good' sign, but I know better now don't I. Its difficult to accept though I have to say. Duncan said it so succinctly last night when he said , 'we have been hanging on to hope for so many weeks, its difficult to let go'. And that's it in a nutshell.
I have joined the Miscarriage Association, and been on the forums there, and I have received some good advise regarding the weekend. It was only recently that I discovered (in my ignorance), that babies past 8 weeks gestation can be delivered tiny but whole. I had pushed that thought away because when you are trying for a baby or just pregnant you don't want to think about it. Now I know what to expect thanks to a lovely online friend and the forum ladies, I don't feel so unsure ( still terrified though). We have also received some emails from The Miscarriage Association regarding our options for the baby after delivery.
Anyway, I have been in the kitchen cooking, both with Oscar and by myself.
Oscar's cakes : Jane Asher cupcake kit
The long awaited {chocolate and lavender pie}
Which I couldn't eat because every time I smell it I want to heave, which is no reflection on the pie because Oscar and Aimee say its YUM.
Blueberry Cookies - I managed to eat these
Meanwhile, Duncan is still making the daily loaf
And Oscar is eating everything which comes out of the kitchen
I have also made up a really fast and easy hat pattern.
Sorry about the seriously dodgy photo's, here is a better one
James C Brett Aran yarn in Monsoon
I am making another slight variation (I have Game Of Thrones to watch in bed and a tub of pringles to keep my knitting company tonight). I may get around to publishing it as a free pattern, maybe.
And finally, I have made this tiny white baby blanket in pure wool. I don't want to say too much about that at the moment, but it felt good to do something practical/physical.
Valerie
xxx
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